Harmony and Eliza are at playgroup and I'm sitting here with Katie dancing on my lap -- she's watching this:
Cami's asleep and it's quiet. I wish I had something profound to say, but the lack of sleep is keeping my profundity at bay. Between 10 and 12, my brain runs at about half capacity. I get a great boost from an almost-daily nap and then drag again in the late afternoon for a few hours. Other than that, though, I'm functioning well. I keep up with my chores, the children do theirs and our home runs smoothly. Cami's a sweet baby who is easy to soothe and loves to be held. There are plenty of arms willing to accommodate her, especially my own.
I shared in our Relief Society meeting on Sunday that I feel like as a mother of nine, I get a front-row seat in understanding God's love for his children. I know that outside our family, it's easy to look at us and see "just another baby" or "ANOTHER girl," to add to "all those kids," but as we've welcomed Cami into our home and hearts, I've been profoundly touched by how unique and precious she is because of who SHE is -- unique and distinct from our other children, even as she shares some of the same characteristics (waking lots at night, sweet-tempered, cute). I've had sacred moments where I've felt humbled by what I hold in my arms and I marvel. How can I love each of my nine children this much?
And knowing how much I love my nine helps me understand, in part, how much God loves his billions and billions. They're not just a crowd to Him -- He knows and loves us and has a purpose for sending us here. He knows your name and loves you.
You Matter to Him
(please read this last link. What I lack in eloquence is much better said in it)
* edited to add -- I didn't realize a small portion of the talk I linked to had been made into this video. The entire talk is SO worth reading, but this is beautiful, too.